Let me start this post by saying that this blog is pretty much a basic journal for me to document the goings on in our lives with just enough information to keep my family and friends informed. It's my outlet for getting my feelings out and for trying to make sense of my sometimes chaotic world. I have never been an overly private person as I don't feel I have much to hide. I do leave out the more private details of my life's journey, but other thoughts I leave here to be shared.
That said...
I distinctly remember how I felt on New Year's Day this year. I felt so excited. I just knew that this year was going to be the best one yet and I felt that good things were going to happen. Well, I'm not sure if I forgot to pass on the memo or what, but here I am eight months later wondering what that feeling was all about.
To put the year in a brief review we'll start with the infamous doctor's appointment on January 3rd that sent us straight to Primary Children's Medical Center where we subsequently spent three weeks (while 4 1/2 months pregnant) trying to figure out what was going on with Kai. It was the end of January when we found out that he had LCH and would undergo 12 months of chemotherapy.
Mercedes was born a few short months later, luckily with no drama. She has been the bright star in our year, but admittedly, life with a newborn is no cakewalk and the sleepless nights have made one tired mama.
Well, here I sit in Primary Children's Medical Center yet again. We've been here for just 24 hours, but what a whirlwind this has been. I took Moira to the doctor yesterday because she'd been dealing with some pretty acute abdominal pain for about 24 hours. The basic causes of a hurting tummy were quickly ruled out and then under examination she was extremely tender which was quite concerning. The doctor did some tests, but let us go home to observe her while the results came back. He called around 4 p.m. to check on her and said the inital reports came back normal; we gave our report from home that she was hurting more. So, on advice from the doctor, we headed up to the hospital to see if she had appendicitis.
Appendicitis is a hard condition to identify so we did all the simple tests first, but we still couldn't tell if that's what she had for sure or not. The doctor decided to do a CT scan which would once and for all confirm or rule out that's what she had. He came in about an hour later with some print outs and said, "Sometimes when we go in looking for one thing we're surprised and find something else. The good news is that she does not have appendicitis." I'm thinking to myself, "Is this good or bad news." He then showed me the slides he was holding and started pointing out obvious things like the spine, the pelvic bones, etc. then he pointed to a large circle that took up a good quarter of the slide and said, "this however doesn't belong here. What we have found is an ovarian tumor the size of a canteloupe." I went to bed last night with a heavy heart, it doesn't seem real that two children should be so sick within just months of each other.
Our little beauty is now about an hour post-operation and seems to be doing well (well at least she's sleeping anyway). The surgeon was able to remove the whole tumor and he was very pleased with how well she did in surgery.
So, now I ask myself, what is this year all about? Will I be able to look back at everything one day and feel a sense of excitement and feel that this did turn out to be a wonderful year or was that the sustaining power of the Holy Ghost preparing me for one of my most stressful and troubling years I have ever experienced? Either way, I'm along for the ride and know that everything will turn out well in the end.
That said...
I distinctly remember how I felt on New Year's Day this year. I felt so excited. I just knew that this year was going to be the best one yet and I felt that good things were going to happen. Well, I'm not sure if I forgot to pass on the memo or what, but here I am eight months later wondering what that feeling was all about.
To put the year in a brief review we'll start with the infamous doctor's appointment on January 3rd that sent us straight to Primary Children's Medical Center where we subsequently spent three weeks (while 4 1/2 months pregnant) trying to figure out what was going on with Kai. It was the end of January when we found out that he had LCH and would undergo 12 months of chemotherapy.
Mercedes was born a few short months later, luckily with no drama. She has been the bright star in our year, but admittedly, life with a newborn is no cakewalk and the sleepless nights have made one tired mama.
Well, here I sit in Primary Children's Medical Center yet again. We've been here for just 24 hours, but what a whirlwind this has been. I took Moira to the doctor yesterday because she'd been dealing with some pretty acute abdominal pain for about 24 hours. The basic causes of a hurting tummy were quickly ruled out and then under examination she was extremely tender which was quite concerning. The doctor did some tests, but let us go home to observe her while the results came back. He called around 4 p.m. to check on her and said the inital reports came back normal; we gave our report from home that she was hurting more. So, on advice from the doctor, we headed up to the hospital to see if she had appendicitis.
Appendicitis is a hard condition to identify so we did all the simple tests first, but we still couldn't tell if that's what she had for sure or not. The doctor decided to do a CT scan which would once and for all confirm or rule out that's what she had. He came in about an hour later with some print outs and said, "Sometimes when we go in looking for one thing we're surprised and find something else. The good news is that she does not have appendicitis." I'm thinking to myself, "Is this good or bad news." He then showed me the slides he was holding and started pointing out obvious things like the spine, the pelvic bones, etc. then he pointed to a large circle that took up a good quarter of the slide and said, "this however doesn't belong here. What we have found is an ovarian tumor the size of a canteloupe." I went to bed last night with a heavy heart, it doesn't seem real that two children should be so sick within just months of each other.
Our little beauty is now about an hour post-operation and seems to be doing well (well at least she's sleeping anyway). The surgeon was able to remove the whole tumor and he was very pleased with how well she did in surgery.
So, now I ask myself, what is this year all about? Will I be able to look back at everything one day and feel a sense of excitement and feel that this did turn out to be a wonderful year or was that the sustaining power of the Holy Ghost preparing me for one of my most stressful and troubling years I have ever experienced? Either way, I'm along for the ride and know that everything will turn out well in the end.
2 comments:
Sara! Poor little Moira! I'm so sorry. As I have always said, if anyone has the strength to handle what life throws us, YOU DO! You are an amazing mom and woman. We will keep your family in our prayers!
Hi Sara. Just found your blog. Sheesh - -what a whirlwind for you guys! You're in our prayers. I think perhaps your guess that "it was the sustaining power of the Holy Ghost preparing me for one of my most stressful and troubling years I have ever experienced" is right on! He must have known you needed to know He was there for you this year - come what may.
I love you for your strength, courage and faith.
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