First Day of School

I woke up this morning with the scene from Finding Nemo running through my head; the one where Nemo swims in to wake up his dad chanting, "First day of school, first day of school." I've been having dreams for the past few nights that we sleep through the first day and I'm having to explain to the teacher and try to get her to take Moira in her class still. Luckily that's one dream that didn't come true!

I can hardly believe that Moira is old enough for school already and yet here we are! I'm joined by parents all over feeling the exact same feeling I'm sure. I didn't cry when I dropped her off with Michael to attend orientation (I had a doctor's appointment...shocker!), I'm not much of a crier anyway, but mostly I was just so excited for her.

I was amazed to hear the report however, that perhaps I would be better suited for first day of school duty. Apparently single mom's find it the perfect opportunity to flirt with the few dads that show up. For shame... lol! Luckily I'm not one of 'those' wives and found it funny. Nice to know I have such a handsome husband and apparently I'm not the only one that thinks so. Thanks for the compliment ladies! :)

Today marked the beginning of years of education to come and I'm excited to be at this stage. We love learning in our home and it will be fun to have a formal setting for the children now. Maybe one day I'll even be a PTA mom, haha, wouldn't that be fun!

Giving thanks!

I have so many fun pictures and funny movie clips from our trip to Bear Lake and I will get them posted as soon as I upload them to my computer. Right now I want to say thank you to wonderful parents who put together such a fun family get away. I know our little family certainly needed it and it was so much fun to spend time with the siblings. Not everyone was able to come and they were sorely missed, perhaps next year circumstances will be such that they will be able to get away as well and get some much deserved family time!! (Hint, hint... plan now or I'm coming to get you to bring you with me... you need to be there!)

Also, Moira had her follow-up this week with the surgeon and the pathology report came back saying the tumor was not cancerous! Yay! I really didn't think that it would be, I know my limits and I'm not sure I could handle two kids in chemotherapy in one year.

Mercedes had her two-month check up and she is growing just right. She's a healthy little girl and is very good at letting us know what she needs. She is smiling a ton and cooing more and more (in fact, right now as she sits in my lap!).

Kai had chemo this week and has lost a little weight, but otherwise had a glowing report. I suspect he spent more time running around at the beach than he would at home and was too excited to sit still long enough to eat a real meal so a little weight loss didn't worry me.

Moira will start kindergarten next week and is so excited. We're all so happy that she is recovered enough that she can go. Mommy and Daddy are a little overwhelmed that we are to the school stage already, but couldn't be more excited for Moira. She has spent the last week convincing me that Kai should be going too and that her teacher can take care of Mercedes. LOL, it's too cute!!

Bear Lake Adventures

My oldest two kids have been counting down the days until we take off for "The Beach." Well, Bear Lake does have a beach and though it may not be the ocean, this beach will suffice and my kids are so excited to be getting away for a few days. Sadly, we have to leave behind papa because he has to work, but we will do our best to enjoy our time without him.

I'll upload pictures as soon as I can of the little cuties basking in the sunshine. Yay for Grammy and Grandad for putting together such a fun get-together. This is one of our yearly traditions that we do as a family that we look forward to every year and luckily it falls while I'm still on maternity leave.

I haven't intentionally planned to have all of my children right at the beginning of the summer, but it sure has worked out well. (Hint for the day... To all of you mommies that work and are thinking about having a baby, try to "schedule" your baby to arrive so that you can feel like a little kid again and have a nice summer vacation.)

Dreams to Reality

I've become very thankful for the little things that life brings and I believe very strongly in the law of attraction. I've been spending the last few weeks focusing on the things that I would like to get out of life and I even wrote out a description of what that life looks like. I have it posted on a board in my office so that I can look at it every day. I believe very strongly that one day that dream will become reality.

When I first took the time to write out the narrative of my dream life, I was struck by the realization that no where did it mention 'things.' When I'm going through a stressful time in life (like now), my automatic response is that I start accumulating 'things.' I suppose some people find shopping therapeutic; perhaps I do on some level too. The odd thing is, I prefer a simplified home without much clutter. Now try melding my behavior with my preference. Haha, it's near impossible.

I figure if I can talk about this, perhaps I will fulfill this need without actually going out to get things I do not need and more importantly things I do not want.

What do you do when you're stressed? I'm not talking about the little "I had a hard day and I'm really tired and stressed so I think I'll go to bed early" stress, I mean the "my life is literally falling apart in front of me and I have no control of the situation" kind of stress. Will I be okay? Sure I will, humans have an amazing ability to bounce back. The world really is not coming to an end, but my life tomorrow will not resemble my life yesterday and that will be okay. I'm focused on my future life and the dream that will one day be my reality.

All is Well

Moira is doing really well today and it looks like we will be able to go home soon. Her spirits are high, she is tolerating food and she can walk a good distance; all criteria to be met before we could be released.
We still don't have a report from pathology, but I suspect that everything will be just fine. Thank you for all the support of family and friends!
I'm now committed to finding something fun to write about. I've had my drama for the decade!

And So It Goes...

Let me start this post by saying that this blog is pretty much a basic journal for me to document the goings on in our lives with just enough information to keep my family and friends informed. It's my outlet for getting my feelings out and for trying to make sense of my sometimes chaotic world. I have never been an overly private person as I don't feel I have much to hide. I do leave out the more private details of my life's journey, but other thoughts I leave here to be shared.
That said...
I distinctly remember how I felt on New Year's Day this year. I felt so excited. I just knew that this year was going to be the best one yet and I felt that good things were going to happen. Well, I'm not sure if I forgot to pass on the memo or what, but here I am eight months later wondering what that feeling was all about.
To put the year in a brief review we'll start with the infamous doctor's appointment on January 3rd that sent us straight to Primary Children's Medical Center where we subsequently spent three weeks (while 4 1/2 months pregnant) trying to figure out what was going on with Kai. It was the end of January when we found out that he had LCH and would undergo 12 months of chemotherapy.
Mercedes was born a few short months later, luckily with no drama. She has been the bright star in our year, but admittedly, life with a newborn is no cakewalk and the sleepless nights have made one tired mama.
Well, here I sit in Primary Children's Medical Center yet again. We've been here for just 24 hours, but what a whirlwind this has been. I took Moira to the doctor yesterday because she'd been dealing with some pretty acute abdominal pain for about 24 hours. The basic causes of a hurting tummy were quickly ruled out and then under examination she was extremely tender which was quite concerning. The doctor did some tests, but let us go home to observe her while the results came back. He called around 4 p.m. to check on her and said the inital reports came back normal; we gave our report from home that she was hurting more. So, on advice from the doctor, we headed up to the hospital to see if she had appendicitis.
Appendicitis is a hard condition to identify so we did all the simple tests first, but we still couldn't tell if that's what she had for sure or not. The doctor decided to do a CT scan which would once and for all confirm or rule out that's what she had. He came in about an hour later with some print outs and said, "Sometimes when we go in looking for one thing we're surprised and find something else. The good news is that she does not have appendicitis." I'm thinking to myself, "Is this good or bad news." He then showed me the slides he was holding and started pointing out obvious things like the spine, the pelvic bones, etc. then he pointed to a large circle that took up a good quarter of the slide and said, "this however doesn't belong here. What we have found is an ovarian tumor the size of a canteloupe." I went to bed last night with a heavy heart, it doesn't seem real that two children should be so sick within just months of each other.
Our little beauty is now about an hour post-operation and seems to be doing well (well at least she's sleeping anyway). The surgeon was able to remove the whole tumor and he was very pleased with how well she did in surgery.
So, now I ask myself, what is this year all about? Will I be able to look back at everything one day and feel a sense of excitement and feel that this did turn out to be a wonderful year or was that the sustaining power of the Holy Ghost preparing me for one of my most stressful and troubling years I have ever experienced? Either way, I'm along for the ride and know that everything will turn out well in the end.

Secret Obsession (or is it?)

I comfort myself with the knowledge that I am so not alone in this little obsession of mine. It took me until the ripe old age of being in my thirties for me to actually have something I could consider an obsession and here it is... I now hold my head up high and proudly admit that I am a Twilight Addict. I love the books and have read the first three so many times that I can't even remember the exact number now; currently I'm on my second time through book 4. I am really looking forward to the movie and find myself googling for information about it when I'm looking for something to occupy my time. I know it's silly, but it gives me something fun to do.

I find it funny that when I go out into public (on the rare occasion I can get out of the house) whether I'm sitting in the waiting room at the doctors office or getting the haircut my hubby so sweetly set up for my birthday, I'm able to connect with total strangers with just one phrase... "So, have you read the Twilight books?"

I found it fun as I started to find out more about Stephenie Meyer to find that I have quite a bit in common with her. Maybe that explains my love of her work, but I think it's more that fact that she's a wonderful writer. I've already read The Host and can hardly wait to see what she does next.

If you haven't read the books yet, pick one (or all 4) up and enjoy! You'll be glad you did.

I'm now on the hunt for the next good book to read. There are so many out there, it's just a matter of finding the right book that speaks to me.

Kai update #2...

Well, I have even better news. I got a call from the doctor on Saturday because he had just gotten the last test results back; he was so excited to share the results that he called on the weekend. Kai has 4 boney lesions (basically a missing section or hole in the bone) throughout his skeletal structure and three of them have completely healed and the third is in the advanced stages of healing. This is SUCH great news and we are so excited. This adds to the news we already had that his spleen and liver are at last back down to normal size. This eases our tensions greatly to know that with just half of the treatment done that we are already in such a great place.

We feel so blessed right now. We have felt a great deal of pressure with all that has been going on so far this year and it finally feels as though we've weathered the storm.

Thank you to all of our family and friends that have kept us in your prayers!